Well, it’s the day after the U.S. Presidential Inauguration here in Australia. The only news we get of the public’s reaction is what is posted on Facebook or the local news. The latter is concerned. One quote about “America First” put one news anchor into a position of worry as “what does that mean for its [America] allies?
Fortunately for this writer, it doesn’t particularly move me. As I told friends prior to leaving the U.S.: I’m leaving just 7 days before Trump takes office and it wasn’t planned. I just hope that in the coming months, America’s international relations don’t get fucked to the point of denied entry internationally. But that’s my two-sense on the matter.
Moving on. Soon, I’ll cast off Australia and start a 12-month work and holiday visa in New Zealand. This has been a long time coming and taken roughly 2 years to coordinate. From the day I decided to follow the Quiet Voice, in February of 2015, to actually ending my contract with the Navy earlier this year, it’s been a hell of a journey.
Many worry I’ll take a page from Christopher McCandless’ book and go Into the wild— disappear to reach fate in Alaska. Honestly, I do resonate with some of his ideals: Leaving society (SOCIETY! SOCIETY! SOCIETY!); casting off the expectations of family and friends; search for inner direction and purpose. In fact, I romanticism his intent, not his execution.
Part of this trip was meant to break away from all I knew and decompress somewhere foreign, but not too foreign. To be frank, I’m coming at this alone, not 100% healthy, and directly after leaving a career and lifestyle I knew since age 18–why add completely un-fucking-known territory? Fortunately, this region is like my second home. The friends I left behind have been supportive of this decision, to the extent of putting me up for the month. Coming to Australia wasn’t about seeing new territory; it’s a staging area for a great adventure. What shouldn’t be neglected though is most of my gracious hosts along the way expressed their fears on the subject. Fears like: When will you come back? Do you have a job lined up? Where will you be next month? What if it doesn’t work out? You know you can come home if things fall through, right?
These fears and concerns collected on my day-to-day thoughts like a snowball. It’s been growing. Day after day, country after country and I’ve allowed it to effect me. But why wouldn’t I? If every person in your life is given a different degree of impact and influence in your life, wouldn’t close friends and family be the most impactful? Don’t get me wrong, I value their opinion, but in a way, I’ve allowed them to have ownership on the matter. Maybe it’s time to go dark for a while and get the much-needed space and room to think.